Contrary to what you might think based on the title, this isn't actually a rant post.
So I work in the hospital and make a living out of taking care of patients. We get paid for service, basically, and earn professional fees for consultations in clinics and admissions in hospitals.
I have always wished there was a way for me NOT to earn a living from my chosen profession... but really, I don't want to do anything else other than being a doctor. I have never been good with selling, and maybe I might have an aptitude for business, I don't really have any interest or inclination to pursue that particular endeavor.
I have had some discussion before with friends, where I mentioned I wish that we could just work for a hospital and get paid a comfortable amount to do the work that we do. No need to charge fees to patients, no pressure to earn a living from individual admissions. Let the hospital or facility do all the marketing and charging, and just focus on taking care of the patient.
And then there are the times when nothing seems to be going your way. You kind of learn to be a little less attached to patients and their families along the way (of training in med school and, after, in the hospital) so that you can manage to function despite morbidities or mortalities... but that isn't really the case. Mostly, you try to put on a brave face and try your best not to let events get to you. But they do. Every setback seems like a failure sometimes. Every random thing that can go wrong can feel like you didn't try your best, especially since things are not yours to control. Not really.
So there are bad days. And then there are bad weeks. And sometimes, when you are unlucky, there are bad months. And you look for that thing that makes you remember why you chose to become a doctor in the first place. And you can't imagine how simple, or easy, it is the find that reason. To continue on doing the work that you do, to practice the art or vocation of medicine, but not the reason for being content with what you are doing.
And sometime other things get involved. Like taxes, and reality, and financial obligations.
So, yeah, when I heard from a friend about a job that involved being a doctor and research, but not actual patient care... which gave a decent salary, which meant I didn't have to earn a living from doctoring... I took a shot a it. I sent in my resume, hoping for the best, but not really expecting anything beyond that. I am naive to the pharmaceutical and other related industries. I have no experience except for teaching and patient care. So it was a big departure from what I knew, and very much different from any training I have ever had.
I was surprised when they emailed back setting up an interview, with who could potentially be my manager. I didn't really know what to expect. I know that I didn't expect the interview to be partly an explanation about the industry and the work that I could be doing if I was chosen for the job.
So fast forward 10 months later, 2 more interviews, 1 presentation on ADPKD... and here I am, on my fourth month on the job.
You sometimes don't realize how unhappy you are until you are exposed to happy. And I am happy. Everything has been new, and challenging, and I have had to learn so many things that I had no idea about before... and it is great. I have "met" more new people, and personalities, and nationalities in the past 4 months than in the past 4 years.
I had thought that starting the job would require a lot of cutting down on clinics and other activities, and this is very much true, however the job has also allowed me a certain kind of freedom where it isn't painful financially to not charge patients for their admissions if I didn't feel like they could afford it.
There are issues, of course, but that is another post for another time.
